Musings (6)

Being aware of the body, of what a body feels like.

My breath flowed in my nostrils, caressing the back of my throat before entering my lungs, the rising of my chest a soft, gentle rising that filled my body with a lukewarm glow. As the motion reaches its crest, it just as quickly falls, and my body relaxes.

I hear the sound of the ceiling fan in the background, a soft, constant hum occasionally precipitated by the distant sounds of my neighbors’ children playing outside the house. A soft suction noise. The inhale. A soft release noise. The exhale.

My thoughts dance around, having slowed down to a slow waltz from the usual samba, as my mind came closer to rest.

Relax into the breath.’

How do I abide as the presence of awareness?’

Ooh, there’s a little bit of tension here.’

Nice, that tightness loosened up by itself.

What is this strange energy-feeling-sensation behind my eyes?’

Surrender everything.’

I am aware. I am aware.’

It feels so light that I can float.’

Am I the content being experienced right now, or am I the one who experiences it?’

I’m the open, empty sky of awareness.’

Thoughts glide in and out of focus, each permutation of my mind becoming slower than the last. I am aware of the thoughts as they pop in and out of existence, just like the noises that the children make.

My feet touch the marble floor. Cool on the skin, with a warm vibration-esque sensation complimented by the moving air from the fan above. My bum feels relaxed from sitting on the couch, the pressure of the soft couch underneath pressing into my clothes against my skin, all with the same aliveness that I felt in my hands, torso, and body.

This must be what being a baby feels like.

To have this soft, open, luminous, light body that ‘I’, consciousness, localizes itself in, to perceive the universe with such aliveness. It feels light, highly sensitive, a stark contrast to the heavy, dense aches and pains from previous injuries from before. It feels refreshing, like I had just woken up from a great beauty sleep to a beautiful day. It feels great.

If light could be felt, then the body is felt light, a vibration of such elegance that I can only correlate it with aliveness. Thoughts then, are lighter, more dynamic frequencies that appear in experience, just as sounds are modulations vibrating air molecules.

Nikola Tesla was right; it’s all energy, frequency and vibration.

Sound, thought, sensation all appear and dance in me. ‘I’, the presence of awareness was the container for all these described experiences, for without me they would not be the known object as ‘I am’ the literal subject. Where sleep was the experience of the absence of everything, this meditative state was the experience of being one with, experiencing, and enjoying the body.

‘This is what it means to be alive.’

‘Noice.’

An effortless letting go. A relaxation. A marvelous experience. A truly beautiful moment.

All it takes is slowing down and being aware of the body. The mind will keep chattering, but that is its function, all you have to do is to just observe it, and if the mind makes observations of the observing, be aware of that, too. There is no need to do anything here, no need to engage with that, all that is needed is for you to be aware.

Being aware is effortless, and that’s all you have to do.

Damn, babies have it good, but so too can you.

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